Love, Sex and Marriage – Indian Style !

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21 Responses

  1. Pradeep says:

    Nicely written… I agree with each and every word…Thanks for writing this article…

  2. Asha says:

    What a great article!!God bless you.

  3. A.S. Hariprasad says:

    Udaiji, you are a gifted writer. Sensitive subject of Love craftily handled. God Bless you.

  4. Darshnee Merchant says:

    Yes our destiny drive our life with our spouse or without or with our parents. Zero ego help us find true LOVE right Sir??

    Very Nice Sir.

  5. Govind says:

    True presentation of eternal love. Nice job sir.

  6. hastimalbarola says:

    nice discussion, thanks for sharing your belief on love

  7. rameshprabhu says:

    sir,eagerly waiting for the release of your book about your love life

    warm regds


  8. E. A. Mukunda Pai says:

    Dear paimam,

    This should be read by younger generation for their benifit.
    Everything is cycle and the shortest shape to include is triangle, which is having three sides. It is magic of three. love, also have three type. To get selfish interest, when it is not satisfied love will fade. 2nd is to get some protection, dependence,If it is not available love will fade. Final love is selfless love,

    Any action of one person may be a discourse, write up speech, action will inspire us and uplift the mental condition, there forms a love ie admiration which is selfless and it is the real love with out any expectation. That is what one will feel from reading your posts. This is pure love. I am also no exemption from that. Going on writing.

    With warm regards,

  9. prakash says:

    thank you for giving such an insight.

  10. prakash says:

    absolutely in relationships,lovemarriages are nothing but physical attractions; will fade away as and when hormones and finances subside.

  11. Ranjith Prabhu says:

    Marriage is supposed to bring happiness to the whole society. What is the point in marrying if just one or two people are happy and the whole world around is worried? Marriage should spread love, not hatred or worries within the society.

    • urmila says:

      suppose you love somebody out of your community, and your parents dont agree to get you married just bcz your communities are differnt, whats the point in believing in your ideas now?

  12. Nand says:

    Good one..!!

  13. Pran Mehta says:

    This seriously answered my problem, thank you! Excellent way to communicate great idea!

  14. Top 25 comments from Speaking Tree

    Gutta Vramayya
    Feb 25, 2013 at 04:09 pm
    “There shouldn’t be any hurt in real love. Your marriage shouldn’t cause any dis-harmony to anybody and anything. Today or tomorrow, or in next birth. Your parents and your children shouldn’t get hurt because of any of your actions that you take in the name of love. If love is real, happiness derives from that. If there is no love, violence will erupt. So, if you are sure can take care of this aspect, then, yes, go ahead and marry – that’s my advice…: I said.

    Sahana Madhyastha
    Feb 25, 2013 at 02:58 pm
    Very good work. I hope our generation has not gone far away to realise the importance of what you say.

    Chaity Biswas
    Feb 25, 2013 at 06:40 pm
    How beautifully written ….
    Loved reading every bit …. Love is Love …nothing else can substitute this feeling and not necessarily it be reciprocated since Love does not need the ‘other’….

    Rekha Ramankutty
    Feb 25, 2013 at 08:07 pm
    🙂 I hope all those people understand this informative blog. And is also a bit of thought provoking for those married ones too.Think positive. You proved again Love is beyond hurt and anything else.

    Ramesh Shenoy
    Feb 25, 2013 at 02:47 pm
    Uday Sir, WOW! Highly romantic. I never knew that you can write such poetical pieces. My idea about you was that you write only only profound philosophy in a simple laymen language to break concepts and conditioning. I would suggest every body who talks about love should read and by-heart this article – especially teen-agers!

    We always chase alien, invaders concepts of love where as we already had most beautiful concepts on love in this universe! Excellent informative blog. Thank you

    Ranganathan Ganapathy
    Feb 25, 2013 at 07:20 pm
    Marriage is the toughest job you’ll ever have. It isn’t all happily ever after once you toss the bouquet. You have to work and nurse it all the time, make effort to tend, communicate, to grow and to evolve together.

    Patience, tolerance, and understanding are key virtues. Anything less than this, is “marriage of convenience”, with expiry date.

    Thought provoking article.

    Ashish Arora
    Feb 25, 2013 at 06:11 pm
    “Even now, if I face troubles in my life, or if I feel stressed, upset or tensed, all I have to do is to think about her and our love…In a moment, a cool gentle breeze of affectionate wind would come from nowhere and soothes my body with a magical touch… An unknown kindest divine energy will flow through. It would give me instant feeling of happiness and relaxation….that’s what I call love…”

    Sounds just like the love of Nandita and Abdul.

    Shekhar Ray
    Feb 25, 2013 at 06:16 pm
    Respected Uday ji,
    It is well established fact that marriage is a kind of legal prostitution based on give and take principle. I read in Mahabharata that in early vedic period there was no system of marriage. Even the system of Gandhva Vivaha, Swambhar etc. are similar to that.
    But, We can’t equalize marriage with prostitution because the bonding of marriage commonly generates love (subconsciously ) but sex relation with a prostitute can’t evolve love, although there are exceptions in both cases.
    Thanks for a thought provoking blog.

    Shreya Mukherjee
    Feb 25, 2013 at 08:41 pm
    I end up in curiosity .. what is the story 🙂

    Sunita Gupta
    Feb 25, 2013 at 08:43 pm
    Yes- I agree with you…Statistically speaking, If you take the total number of sexual acts happening around the world, given in this minute, only less than one percent of partners really love each other…” I shared my knowledge that I acquired from reading

    pasting these lines from your blog . love may bring u together ( inintial rush of hormons )but it is the endurance and commitment which keeps you together . and then in the later stages the kind of love which emerges in the marriage is like –chivass 24 yrs. of maturity .

    there is nothing like indian marriage or westren marriage . marriage is only marriage with the same concept all over the world –security, dependence , understanding nd respect for each other and rest follows there after .

    few years back men were very particular about the virginity of a girl but today the accepted fact is that there may be hardly any virgin girl and this shift in attitude is really pathetic nd deteriorating .

    so , in any relationship people ( especially the younger lot ) have to learn not to abuse themselves or the subject of ur love . try nd maintain the sanctity of love . –again a very nice article , ur style in ur way expressed nicely

    Swati Arora
    Feb 25, 2013 at 08:52 pm
    Well,Uday ji very nice blog.But I want to say one thing that we blame young generations for not understanding love or misunderstanding or confusing love with sexual intercourse .But they are not to be blamed for all this because they were not told about our ancestors.They don’t know who was “Kacha and Devayani, Usha and Aniruddha, Savitri and Satyavan, Madhavanala and Kamakandala, Urvashi and Pururva, Dushyant and Sakuntala or between gods like Shiv Parvathi and Radha and Krishna.” ( AS YOU HAVE MENTIONED IN THE BLOG).

    Today’s generation do not have an idea of Ramayana or Mahabharta.They have not read Geeta or our scriptures.Because their parents also don’t know about our ancestors and never felt important to make their children read about it.(I HAVE READ THAT YOU GAINED ALL THIS KNOWLEDGE AFTER READING GEETA AND OUR SCRIPTURES)

    As per my view the reason for breaking up of marriages is very simple – Most relationships are not working because each one is begging for happiness from the other. When two beggars get married, beggary increases! But once you start giving to each other, there’s magic!Always give , give , give to others.

    Sai baba says – “The best way to receive is to give.”Actually these days each and every soul is empty from inside.So,we all are expecting from others and asking others to fill that emptiness.Wen we connect ourselves to the supreme and fill our emptiness with His love we can spread his love to others and give love to our spouse.Once there is true love between spouses then there will be understanding,respect,freedom.

    Kiran Arora
    Feb 26, 2013 at 06:11 am
    Beautifully written .In the era of digitally mediated behaviour there is a shift from eternal to ephemeral. Now flings have been manipulated and encapsulated as love which are supposed to give excitement ,fun and so called a stand for a week, month or year.just temporary happiness based on gifts , fun and inflated ego’s has taken the shape of love which actually has no fundamental base and can erupt any time with a small word even. Marriage also is taking place of just secure relationship and real love has lost its value . Love is now based upon mammoth of emotions and on conditions . It need patience,tolerance and understanding to build a foundation of love under all circumstances with purity acceptance and minimal expectations

    Shashi Bhushan
    Feb 26, 2013 at 10:00 am
    WOW!!!, YEOMEN SERVICE FOR ALL especially to younger generation, flow is excellent,views are flawless, efforts to clear the muddle between love, sex and marriage are appreciable and agreeable, i will recommend this piece of write up must find place in educational curricula of graduate students of all hues in the best wishes and regards!!

    Tincy Mathew
    Feb 26, 2013 at 10:28 am
    When will we get to see “LOVE OF PAI”, now that we saw “LIFE OF PI” bagging Oscars!!! Excellent article on love and sex. A set of fresh ideas.


    As I commented in your previous blogs, you are a magician. You take readers into different realm and break their concepts. All your blogs have longer shelf-value. I used to check your website ( frequently to see if you have posted any new articles. If you didn’t, I read archived articles again (specially about GODs and enlightenment) which have supportive energy.

    I would be eagerly waiting to know about the vivid experience of love that you had in your life. When would you publish it? I am very sure that that would be totally different and enlightening experience – that makes expectations very high.

    May god bless you sir

    Rameshwar Gupta
    Feb 26, 2013 at 12:46 pm
    A romantic story depicting the free flow of western culture.
    Nice entertaining blog

    Anima Jain
    Feb 26, 2013 at 03:27 pm
    Hats off Dr…:) sensitively handled write up…it’s refreshing to see so many viewpoints and believers of love….Today there is more confusion about love as its difficult to tell the difference between infatuation and love, since its similar in many ways, ….but with colossal difference…..All the elements associated with love work together with no effort for the greater good and well-being of another with no expectation and need to impress, gain status or seek acknowledgment, effortlessly displaying consideration, caring, patience, kindness, benevolence, humbleness, selflessness, self-restraint, respect, support, compromise, compassion and kindness. If this is not present, you can be certain its not love. Love is its own reward. Follow your heart but don’t forget to take your brains with you….:):):)

    Surinder Raina
    Feb 26, 2013 at 03:33 pm
    My take is there is neither masculine nor feminine in love. It is gender less. Love is an attitude, a feeling of oneness. Everything looks like self. Even if a flower is plucked from a plant….pain is felt.
    May be it is philosophy or madness. But it is indeed good refreshing and loving too.

    Mahavir Nautiyal
    Feb 26, 2013 at 06:11 pm
    Dear Udaylal ji,
    Happy to see you back with your dialectical skills displayed in the blog. You have used Venky as a prop to take some heat off you !
    After some verbal meanderings, you always come to certain lasting truths of life supported by the best in scriptures. Yes, love endures only if ego is dissolved whether it is pre-marriage or post-marriage relationship. Sex is a natural biological expression in sentient beings but it does not pre-suppose love. It requires patience, understanding and a spirit of mutual sacrifice to sustain love. These qualities are not generally found in abundance in the present young generation who are mesmerized by the fast life style of the West. I am not suggesting that all Eastern values are admirable in so far as relationship between opposite sexes is concerned (( To some people, pre-marital sex is a sin, in most of the cases girls are treated with scorn and disdain for indulging in pre-marital sex whereas the boys earn kudos from their peers for their sexual exploits). To call sex as love making, as described in many writings/ novels is absolute debasement of the sublime and divine concept of love

    Vinay Thakur
    Feb 26, 2013 at 09:20 pm
    Everything has possibility of failure, love, hate everything…lot of things mixed together in article…love as general concept, man-women love, etc…very theoretical…almost critical about everything new generation does or believes in…

    Karthi Keykarthi
    Feb 27, 2013 at 03:44 pm
    Good one sir! God Bless!
    Sex is Holy ONLY for the species, which uses it expand the species…but not so for the individual!
    Nature is very clever..for it has kept the greatest physical pleasure / joy here!
    If sex gave us pain in an equal level instead of joy……..Who will be interested?
    It is only a pleasure ACT for most animals ..except when there is Total surrender to each other or oneness of MIND!..and Human being is capable of this!

    Priti Mishra
    Feb 27, 2013 at 06:39 pm
    Where there is no love cannot be peace . Where there is no purity , there cannot be love ..

    Sunita Rajiv
    Feb 28, 2013 at 12:30 am
    …………..In this experience, there is no end, no comedy, no tragedy – love is love. It has to be experienced….and that’s the real and only divine experience that anyone can have in this universe…You have to experience the real love ……………………


    फूल से कैसे कहूं रंग है या खुशबु तू

    तेरा वजूद है क्या, क्या है तेरी आरज़ू?

    तुझे मैं छु लूं की दिलकश है तेरा हुस्न या फिर

    तेरी महक को सहेजू साँसों में भर कर?

    loved your blog UDAY JI god bless you !

    Sujata Patnaik
    Feb 28, 2013 at 02:14 pm
    Udayji !!

    Felt like reading a book in minutes. Concepts of love defined so well. When ever I see a lengthy article I skip; thinking I would read it later. This kept me confined till the end.

    Would wait for your blogs on diverse topics.

    Thanks and regards.

    Karan Chowdhary
    Feb 28, 2013 at 10:33 pm
    Thank you for such a knowledgeable blog on Love. I felt calm and at peace after reading your story and also re-emphasized my thoughts about Love !!!

    Thank you for sharing.

    Changeman Citizen Mitter Vedu
    Mar 01, 2013 at 10:45 am
    Treated a burning question maturely! Love and lust are two sides of the same coin! Lust is the desire to possess as an object of pleasure whereas love is to facilitate living a glorious life without expectations. The first is God-given for perpetuation of the race and material evolution; the second is for spiritual evolution. Both are mixed everywhere even as matter and spirit are interwoven for cosmic play. The proportion is the dispute!

    Anil Kumar
    Mar 01, 2013 at 11:50 am
    Very clear thinking
    clear ideas

    Sumita Kataria
    Mar 01, 2013 at 12:38 pm
    Love is misinterpreted
    People depending on each other say that they are in love whereas it is not love, it is the insecurity of their dependence on each other for the reason which is sometimes not known to them but there always is the reason.

    Ishwar Hamesha Saath Hai.

    Raj Kumar Hansdah
    Mar 04, 2013 at 12:42 am
    It is WONDERFUL !!!
    It is so profound !!!
    Thank you for this; I am sure everyone who reads this, will be benefited.
    “Jai Guru Dev” !!!
    Raj Kumar


  15. SAUMYA .S says:

    please do write about ur true love ….please….

  16. JP Rana says:

    Very Nice.

  17. Chathurmukh says:

    I really appreciate your content. The write-up has actually peaks my interest. I’m going to bookmark your web site and keep checking for new articles

  18. Amrut Roy says:

    Thank you a lot for sharing this with all of us. Bookmarked.

  19. Margarett Fernandes says:

    You really make it seem so easy together with your presentation however I to find this matter to be actually one thing that I think I might never understand. I am looking ahead on your next post, I will attempt to get the hang of it!

  20. ved bell says:

    nice work, if “work” is what you call this. it is a joy to read.

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